*Which pattern (rigid complementarity, competitive symmetry, or submissive symmetry) do you think would be the most difficult to change? Why? Which would be the most damaging to a relationship? Which would be the most potentially damaging to the self-esteem of the individuals involved?
I think that the competitive symmetry may be the most difficult pattern to break or change. In this pattern both people experience the one-up syndrome where they have to be the best. It is frustrating for both people in the relationship because neither one is willing to back down. This pattern can be seen a lot in athletes because athletes are trained to be very competitive and they have to win. In relationships there has to be give and take, not one person can always be the winner.
I think that rigid complementary would be the most damaging to a relationship because one person is feeling resentful and the other is feeling dissatisfied. If one person in the relationship is always dominant over the other then there is obviously a lack of communication. It is never good for a relationship for one person to always be in control. I know that if my fiance was always dominant then i would feel unappreciated and resentful and we probably wouldn't be getting married.
I also think that the rigid complementary pattern would be the most damaging to someone's self-esteem. In the rigid pattern there is someone who fills the submissive role. When someone is always submissive then they aren't ever getting what they want but they are doing what the other person wants. Not getting what you want can definitely be damaging to your self-worth because the relationship is making you feel like your wants and needs aren't important, therefore you aren't important.
I didn't feel that submissive symmetry pattern really fit any of the questions that is why I used the rigid pattern twice.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
I completely agree that the competitive symmetry is the most difficult pattern to break or change. I agreed with your reasoning and I also felt as though people in this type of relationship tend to be more controlling with one another and ultimately would not be able to compromise fully, which is very important in a relationship. I understand what you are saying about rigid complementary being the most damaging to a relationship, but I also feel as though competitive symmetry will be very damaging because I ultimately do not think it would work out between the two controlling and competitive people. But on the other hand I feel as though you are completely right also.
Post a Comment