Judging potential dating partners

*Think about the filters you use to eliminate people from consideration as potential romantic partners. What characteristics or behaviors lead you to judge others as unattractive? Does Duck's theory make sense to you? Have you ever eliminated someone by using a sociological or pre-interaction cue only to reconsider them based on interaction and cognitive cues?

Once reading about Duck's theory on attraction I learned that I am guilty of using pre-interaction cues. I know that when I check out a guy I look at his physical appearance, the way they are dressed and so on. For example if I saw some skater guy with big baggy clothes and long greasy hair wearing a beanie I probably wouldn't turn my head twice. (And yes I realize that I just made a big stereotype, but it is for the sake of my example.) However, if I saw a tall guy dressed in a polo and fitted jeans with short hair and a clean shaved face I would give him a double take; these are all examples of pre-interaction cues that I use.

I know this sounds cliche but I definitely measure attractiveness by the heart. I am engaged and in order to get to this step Brad my fiance had to fit the mold of the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Yes, on the surface he is good looking but it is his heart that really made me fall in love with him. He has such a passion for life, he does everything full out. He loves the Lord with all of his heart and this is a number one priority in finding a spouse for me, because I am a christian. He also is very kind a respectful and has a soul of integrity and he is very loyal.

Brad isn't the world's idea of perfect he has one leg and to many girls who are using Duck pre-interaction cues this would be a red flag telling them they are not interested. I got to know Brad as Brad and I don't care that he is missing a limb because he is more complete then any other man I have ever met. Sometimes we miss out on the amazing relationships when we use pre-interaction cues. I am very glad that I didn't judge Brad by his physical appearance or else I might not be getting married.